"This is one time where television really fails to capture the true excitement of a large squirrel predicting the weather." – Bill Murray, Groundhog Day

It’s Groundhog Day! … do you ever feel like that when you are dealing with the same problem…yet again…from the same person.

Of course you do, we all do…and typically the reason why is that the issue was never actually fixed to begin with. There was a halfhearted discussion, with halfhearted commitment and the real issue was put off until another day.

Let’s change that by really confronting issues, kindly AND directly….AND having real consequences. John Townsend offers a simple formula with this 8 Step Conflict Resolution model.

1. Start with a “I respect and am for you stance” … this may look like, “I need to share some thoughts that may be hard to hear; but you are too capable and too important for our companies success to not have this discussion”

2. Clearly state the issue that needs to be addressed…don’t beat around the bush, as Brene Brown has said “Clear is Kind”.

3. Own your contribution…have you allowed this to linger, did you see it but not say anything before, did you give them the tools and training, if you are the leader you probably own some part of this issue

4. Hear them out…allow them to talk. To have this conversation turn out well, they don’t need to agree, but they need to feel heard; plush you might find out something that changes your perspective. Give them 2-3 minutes to and then get back to addressing the issue.

5. Request a change with a win/win stance…what is the specific behavior you want to see? How will that benefit them and the organization?

6. Tell them the natural consequences of not changing (when needed)…what will happen if they don’t change? Don’t let people be surprised if you need to have that next conversation.

7. Return to the “I am for you stance” …You want them to “win” and they need to know it. This helps bring safety back so they can focus on performance for the team rather than operating out of fear.

8. Follow up 24 hours later…check back in with them, help them know you really are for them.

As leaders lets care enough about our people to be clear with them and to solve problems for good. If it feels like groundhog day around the office what did you miss?